“I’m an idiot. I’m just a stupid guy who’s never had to care about anyone else’s feelings but my own. I get anything I want because of who I am, and even when someone doesn’t want to give me something I want, I always find a way to get it out of them,” I tell her, the words coming out in a rush, and she sniffles.
“But I am my parents’ child, and they are good people. I swear I’m not all bad.” I shift between her thighs, trying to calm the erection that sprang to life just from being pressed against her. “I know everything I’ve done to you, said to you, teased you about all year has taught you nothing but the contrary, but I swear on my life I’d never do anything to hurt you, Evie. And I’d hurt anyone else who even thought to try,” I growl, and her eyes widen.
“Nath—”
“No. I’m serious. Think about it. All those lazy fucks at school who come into your library and leave it looking like shit—it’s me who fixes their mess, just so you don’t have to,” I tell her.
She blinks. “I thought it was just part of your—”
“My OCD? No. My OCD only dictates my tidiness, my own messes, my own order. Have you ever seen me straightening Trenton’s pencils and books when he’s sitting beside me in study hall?”
“Well, no, but—”
“And have you ever seen me tucking in people’s shirts or fixing their ties?”
“Also no—”
“That’s because that shit doesn’t bother me. What bothers me is them coming in there and forcing my woman to take care of them, when she should be focusing on pleasing me!” I growl ferociously, unable to keep my emotions in check, my breaths now sawing in and out of my lungs as the rage I feel causes the edges of my vision to vignette.
I don’t know how long I stay like that, the anger radiating throughout my entire body. I can’t get the unwanted, intrusive thoughts out of my head that my OCD causes to play on repeat, as I imagine people hurting Evelyn—physically causing her pain, fucking with her emotions, bringing her unnecessary stress. I’m stuck in the cycle, the uncontrollable thoughts repeating, repeating, over and over, making me angrier every time the reel starts over, making me want to screa—
“Your woman?” I hear Evie’s voice in the distance. “This whole time, you’ve thought of me as your woman?”
The moment her palm cups my jaw, the repetitive thoughts stop on a dime, not even fading into the background; they’re just… gone, and all I see is her.
“Nathaniel,” she whispers. “Are you with me?” No fear, no cowering from the rage she couldn’t have missed pouring off me, no horror in her eyes from seeing me get stuck in my intrusive thought cycle. She brings me back, and all I can do is nod.
She gives me a gentle smile, using her thumb to trace over my bottom lip, a gesture so sweet I don’t even know how to process it. I’ve never let anyone touch me so tenderly before.
“So… no blackmail then?” She bites her lip.
I shake my head slowly. “No blackmail. Your secret is safe… even if you don’t want me.” I swallow.
Her chin wobbles even as she smiles, and she gives me a little nod. “Thank you, Nate.”
“You’re welcome, Evie.”
We stay like that, just staring into each other’s eyes, until she starts to squirm. “Am I too heavy?” I ask her, starting to lift my weight, but she tightens her grip on me, catching my bicep in her other hand to keep me close.
“No, it’s not that,” she says low, and then she turns shy, her cheeks turning pink.
“What is it, little mouse?” I ask, lowering so I can kiss her bottom lip that’s red from her biting it.
“I… I um. Well….” She makes a nervous sound that’s not quite a laugh.
“What is it, Evelyn?” I ask, making my tone more of a command, so maybe she’ll have an easier time answering.
She swallows and meets my eyes shyly. “I want you. And I know I’m your sub and I shouldn’t make any type of demand of you, and I should be satisfied after the amazing things we did last night, and usually I can only handle one night of scenes a week, but I just really feel… super close to you right now, and what I want more than anything in this world right now is for you to make love to me and—”
I slam my mouth down on hers, cutting off her nervous rambling, and kiss her with everything in me. I pour all the feelings I have for her into this kiss, and soon I’m aware of the way her hips are rocking beneath me.
I press my forehead to hers, our breaths quick and loud between us. “You saying you’re mine, little mouse?” I ask, needing to confirm what I took from all those words she spewed.