Unable to sit, I pace the length of my office, up and down. I walk back and forth like a caged tiger. The four walls are tight, making me feel claustrophobic—funny, it’s not something I’ve noticed before.
My thoughts are tumbling over each other, and I feel like I need…more. Aurora was like a tonic, and I can’t get enough.
Intoxicating. Invigorating. Sexy. Sensual.
I could go on and on to describe her like this, but what the fuck I really want is her in flesh and blood.
In my mind, I can see her curvaceous body, her milky white skin, her perfect tits and delicious pink nipples protruding proudly, begging to be played with.
Sighing, I eventually stop in front of my liquor cabinet and pull out a heavy crystal glass. A few ice cubes and the best scotch that money can buy will make my desire simmer down, hopefully. I go back to sitting in my leather chair behind my desk.
My fingers play with my phone. If only I’d thought to take a photo or two, I’d have something to look at. As it is, I need to rely on my memory.
Her soft, long blonde hair cascading over her body is etched into my mind. Pity those blue eyes of hers have such a sad expression. Even when she smiles, sadness haunts her.
What has made such a beauty so sad?
Whatever it is, I wish could make it better. Perhaps I’ll call her and take her out.
I can woo her, lay the world at her feet. I want to spoil her rotten, shower her with expensive gifts and lavish her with praise.
The thing about being a Grayson brother is that I have the means and the influence to fulfill this woman’s every dream.
But can I make contact with her? My brothers and I made that damn agreement about staying away from her.
What was I thinking? My brother always end up getting in my way, sure, but I’ll be damned if I lose Aurora over that.
Before I know what’s happening, my index finger presses speed dial. In less than two rings, I have Declan and Jasper on the phone.
“Couldn’t sleep?” Jasper teases.
“Ha, ha.” I reply and push my chair back so I can rest my feet on my desk.
With my left hand, I swirl my glass and watch the amber liquid float up to the rim of the glass and down again.
I’m not sure why I called them. If we had one of those close brotherly relationships like many people do, we might actually talk about what happened.
“Feeling okay?” Declan asks, and for once, he sounds like he expects an answer.
“Fucking fantastic,” I reply and take a sip of my Scotch. “You?”
“Unbelievable,” agrees Declan.
“You two don’t get out much.”
Instead of getting annoyed at the dig, I smile.
“Fuck you, Jasper. I know you fucking loved it. That grin on your face, I haven’t seen it that big since you were five years old and mom gave you a double serving of your favorite ice cream.”
“Four. I was four years old,” he corrects.
“Whatever. You can’t tell me that wasn’t one of your best fucks in a long time—if not ever.”
“Okay. You got me. It was pretty damn good, wasn’t it?”
For a few minutes, or maybe only seconds, we’re silent. I can hear them breathing.
Why are we talking on the phone? We all live in the same city. Why didn’t we debrief properly, in person, over a drink?
I sigh. It sucks to have a dysfunctional but successful family.
“What’re we going to do?” Declan, ever the deep thinker, asks.
“Go after her,” Jasper jumps in before I can say anything.
“We can’t.” Again, Declan speaks before I get the chance.
My mind’s working overtime. Was he sure we can’t go after her? Why can’t we go after her?
But I know the answer already: it’s because of what happens when the three of us decide to go for the same fucking woman.
“Did you see how sad she looked when we left?” I decide to steer them away from the question at hand.
“Wonder what the backstory is?” Declan asks.
“I don’t know,” I reply. “It must be something big. I mean, why did she offer herself to be auctioned up like that? She’s too beautiful to sell her body and those eyes—there’s so much…pain there,” I say, wondering about her.
Only deep loss leaves scars like that. Who did she lose?
No doubt a loved one. Was it a husband, a lover, a family member…?
I’m burning with curiosity. Another reason to get in touch with her. I will find out her story and try to help.
“You know—” I muse, but Jasper cuts me off before I can begin, as if the bastard can read my mind.
“Forget it. We already said this is it. One night. No more.”
Sounds so brutal, so final.
I still can’t understand why we decided not to pursue her. Family honor be damned. I’d rather lose my brothers than lose her.