“You have.”
“Then why all the jumping to conclusions? I don’t get it.”
She’s back to fidgeting. “I guess I haven’t been completely up front with you.”
I don’t like the way that sounds. Not at all. Maybe she slept with Bushman Tiny Dick while we’ve been on the outs. Maybe he finally gave her an orgasm with his mini-cock and my orgasm magic isn’t magical anymore. It occurs to me I’ll see her at Vi’s wedding. I’ll have to get drunk to manage, or I’ll bring a trampy date so I don’t have to go alone. I don’t have my honey list to draw from anymore and I don’t want to create a new one.
“Up front how?”
“No one ever pushed me to be good at anything besides being pretty when I was growing up. All the focus was on Alex and how talented and smart he was. I refused to figure skate, which might have been part of the problem. My mom was crushed when Alex chose hockey as a career. It was crazy. She refused to see that he loved it so much more, and that doing both was making him miserable.”
“How long did he do both?”
“Ten years.”
Well, that definitely explains why he’s such an awesome skater. “That’s a long time.”
“Anyway, she got over it eventually. She didn’t really have a choice. Then she started to see things differently. Alex makes a lot of money. All the good players do—you know that. After a while I think my mom decided I’d end up with one of his hockey friends. That way I’d be taken care of or whatever.”
“What do you mean by taken care of?” I have an idea where this is going, and it’s kind of messed up.
“Financially.”
“Why would you need someone to do that?”
She gives me a small, patronized smile. “Because I’m not Alex-smart or talented. Living in his shadow was hard growing up. It still is sometimes. In high school I started dating Kale because he was the opposite of my brother and all his friends. The only thing he did was smoke weed and pretend to be on the debate team. He had zero ambition, and nothing has changed. I mean, the guy has half a university degree and works part time. He still lives in his parents’ basement and probably always will.”
“But you dated him for four years.”
“We were teenagers. He was consistent, and he liked me for me, not because my brother played professional hockey and he wanted tickets to games or introductions to players. He doesn’t even play sports, unless you count beer pong. Lily was dating Benji, and he and Kale were best friends. My parents thought Kale was harmless, and my mom figured I’d outgrow him. She was right.”
“Daisy still seems to love on him, though.”
“Only because I’m not with him anymore. We’d been friends for a long time. He was easy to be with. When high school ended, I figured it was a good time to move on. It was awkward at first with Lily and Benji still together, but eventually Kale started dating someone else, so it was better.” She sets her glass on the table and runs her hands down her thighs. “I shouldn’t have gone on that camping trip with him. He was on the rebound, and I knew it. But I also want you to know that decision was about more than the pictures of you and the hooker bunnies or making you jealous.”
“What was the point, then?”
“I love my mom. She’s a great person, and she has the best intentions, but I don’t want to become her.” Sunny sighs. “When you started calling, she was all over it working out between us, and not just because you’re a great guy, which you are. My mom likes her lifestyle. She likes not having to go to work every day and going to the spa and lunch dates with her friends. She figured I’d want the same, but I don’t.
“So part of going on the camping trip was me trying to figure out if I could handle this with you, especially having seen how hard it’s been for Violet. I don’t want who I am to be swallowed by who I’m with.”
That makes some sense. I like that Sunny has ambition and drive. She could coast along and sponge off her brother if she wanted—he’d definitely support her—but that’s not her MO. “I would never want that.”
“I know.” She shifts closer and crosses her legs so her knees touch the outside of my thigh. “I’m just explaining why I had such a hard time.”
“And you thought I was gonna fuck and chuck.”
“I know that’s not true.”
I stretch an arm out across the back of the couch. “It took a while for you to believe me.”
“It shouldn’t have. I should listen to my intuition over other people.”