Snow was quiet for a few moments as he caught his breath and his thoughts. “I’ve changed my mind about us having a family.”
Jude went still, his mouth hanging open before he snapped it shut. “First the sexiest marriage proposal ever, then this. Who are you and what have you done with my general?”
Snow pushed up, his expression serious. “I was manacled in that horrible room and all I could do was think about whether you were okay. I didn’t know if they’d shot you or what, but I just knew I was terrified. The thought of losing you felt like I was losing the whole world. It hit me then that I want this with you. While the idea of a little Jude running around is appealing as hell, I think I’d like to adopt, though. There are so many kids out there who need homes, and I feel we could give them a good one.”
“I’d love to do that.”
“I don’t know what kind of father I’ll be, and I have to admit to being terrified of trying.”
“But you truly want this? You’re not just saying it because you know it’s what I want?”
Snow softly kissed his lips. “I know how much you long for a family, and I love you more than I ever thought it possible to love anyone. So yes, I want it for you. But I also want it for me. We can adopt and then maybe discuss the surrogate idea.”
“Oh, you’re talking more than one child.” It seemed Jude was holding his breath.
God, he’d known, of course he’d known, how much Jude wanted this, and he wanted to kick his own selfish ass for holding out so long, but he also knew he hadn’t been ready before. Seeing the look of hope and wonder on Jude’s face brought that heavy swell of emotion back up his chest. “You and I make a beautiful family and I would be happy if we stayed that way, but I truly feel we’ll be even happier with children. I’m ready.”
Jude blinked and Snow realized he was fighting tears. He smiled, touched as always by how big and beautiful this man’s heart was. He had lots of love to give, and he’d make the best father in the world. Snow wanted to give him that.Snow looked around his living room, taking in his friends gathered for dinner. Rowe, Noah, and Andrei talked with Jude quietly on the couch, Rowe probably making sure Jude was still feeling okay. Snow had no idea what Rowe had done to cover up their rescue of him, and he could only be thankful that whatever it was, it had kept Jude from being in the law’s crosshairs. As far as the police knew, Gene Schaefer had run off, leaving his business and family. That was all they ever would know.
Since Jude had told the police at the hospital that Snow had been kidnapped, they’d stopped at a lonely gas station north of Cincinnati and had Snow call Jude’s cell phone from the pay phone. The story was that Snow had been beaten and dumped at the gas station after his wallet was stolen. Snow doubted the police were at all satisfied with that story, but since there was no other information forthcoming, they closed the case.
Ian and Hollis had yet to arrive for the evening, but they were on their way. A fire crackled in the fireplace, and the smell of Anna’s mac and cheese had his mouth filling with saliva. He was completely addicted to the stuff, and Jude now made it for the group often. Ian was bringing a lasagna. Tonight was carb city, apparently.
Snow didn’t care. He was just happy to have everyone together and in one piece. He touched his eye, which was mostly healed, and smiled when Lucas walked up to him, little Daci cradled in his arms. Her tiny fist came up and Lucas brought it to his mouth for a kiss. The man was pure putty in that baby’s hands, but Snow got it. She made him feel things he’d never expected himself. He looked down at her beautiful, brown eyes.
“That is one gorgeous child,” he murmured.
“She gets that from her daddy,” Lucas replied, kissing her fist again. He wore casual clothes tonight, a sweatshirt and jeans, and he had a small blanket over his shoulder. He still managed to look perfectly put-together, even with a small bit of spit up on his shirt.
“Admit it, you knew she’d look like this when you insisted on a surrogate, didn’t you?” Snow touched the top of her head gently. She had pitch-black hair and it was so soft, he couldn’t help but stroke it.
“I had my hopes, but I knew I wanted our first child to come from him. I was hoping she’d get his eyes.”