And even if he and Snow never had kids, all these little ones could visit Uncle Snow and Uncle Jude. They’d have sleepovers and trips to the zoo. There would be Christmases and birthday parties. And so much laughter.
“Well, I think we’ve definitely found a babysitter,” Andrei said softly.
“Anytime you want,” Jude offered. He looked over at Snow to find his lover closely watching. He couldn’t read his thoughtful expression, but he was relieved when Snow easily echoed his offer of “Anytime.”
With the baby settled in her nearby Pack ’n Play with a full belly and a clean diaper, dinner was ordered and delivered. The new parents were looking more than a little exhausted with dark circles under their eyes. They cleared off the dining room table of random baby items and tucked into some excellent Thai. Apparently, they’d largely been living off whatever Ian was bringing over, but Hollis was keeping him home for a few days to catch up on sleep. The chef had been splitting too much of his time between wedding planning, his restaurant Rialto, and Daciana.
“Of course, she loves Ian. He’s the one with the magic touch,” Lucas said.
“What?” Snow asked.
Andrei chuckled. “Every time she cries, we hand her to Ian and she instantly stops.”
Lucas shook his head as he grabbed some noodles with his chopsticks. “I say it’s because he smells like food every time he comes over.”
“Ha!” Snow said and then winced when he realized he might have spoken too loud. When he continued, his voice was barely over a whisper. “I’m telling him you said that.”
“Asshole,” Lucas grumbled.
The rest of the evening passed enjoyably with them talking about lighter topics, though most of it centered around Lucas and Andrei discovering all the interesting little quirks and disasters that came with being new parents. Sleep was currently in short supply. Babies apparently had a magical ability to have more things come out of their bodies than actually went in. Lucas explaining that interesting discovery might have put both Snow and Jude nearly on the floor in tears with laughter.
Unfortunately, it also woke up Daciana.
To Jude’s surprise, Snow was the first to his feet, scooping the little girl up. He cradled her close to his chest and proceeded to slowly walk around the open floor plan, rocking her and rubbing her back. Jude’s heart pounded painfully in his chest as he watched the two slowly make their progress along the dark windows looking out over the city.
Lucas’s hand landed on Jude’s shoulder and squeezed. Jude shook his head, smiling at his own surprise. “I would never have expected this,” he whispered.
“It looks like he’s trying to figure something out for himself,” Lucas observed.
“I’ve told him that I’ve made peace with us not having kids.”
“Maybe he hasn’t.”
Jude looked at Lucas, who just smiled enigmatically at him. There was no one else in Cincinnati who’d known Ashton Frost longer than Lucas Vallois. And it was enough to give Jude a little hope.
“How have you been, Jude?”
And then the weight was back. He didn’t blame Lucas. He knew the man was concerned for him and just wanted to help. Jude had appreciated the couple of hours’ relief they’d managed to find with this wonderful little family.
“About as bad as you’d expect.” Jude murmured, not wanting to disturb Daciana or her doting uncle. “We…we found some information out about the source of Jordan’s injuries. He was…was beaten…and—”
“You know you aren’t obligated to tell me anything,” Lucas interrupted when Jude struggled to get the words out.
“I know. We found a video of him being…” Jude’s voice drifted off as his throat seemed to close up. But Lucas nodded, indicating that he followed Jude’s line of thought.
“Do you know who did this?”
Jude shook his head. “We’ve got Rowe digging into it.”
He paused and looked down at his empty hands. When it came to Jordan and this whole situation, he’d never felt so helpless in his life. He’d made a career of helping other people. He’d spent his life helping out his family, working to make ends meet, and just being there for his brothers. How could he be so helpless and useless now?
“I just…I don’t understand how Jordan got himself into this situation and why he didn’t ask me for help before things got so bad. I feel like I’ve failed him. I thought he knew that I was always there for him, but he never came to me.”
“You see that man in there with my daughter?” Lucas asked.
Jude looked up and a small smile lifted his lips. Andrei had turned on some low bluesy music and Snow was now rocking her in time with the music while nuzzling her little head. Snow looked so utterly content.
“That very happy man in there made me feel the exact same more times than either of us would care to count. I’m sure he’s told you about his past.”