Snow and Jude stood perfectly still for several heartbeats. Snow couldn’t even drag a breath into his lungs at Anthony’s angry words. While they were both in shock, Anthony darted past them and started running down the street. Jude reacted first, pulling free of Snow to make a grab for the smaller man. But he was too quick. He dodged Jude’s hand and disappeared into the darkness.
“Let him go,” Snow said, weariness creeping into his voice. Anthony had too big of a lead on them, and Snow didn’t want to throw another rock at the asshole. “I think we got what we came for.”
“You believe him?” Jude cried. He swung around, staring at Snow with incredulous and pain-filled eyes.
“I do.”
They were easily two of the hardest words Snow had ever had to say to Jude, because he would see both the desperate denial and crushing pain warring in his expression. But Anthony had only given up the information when pushed to an angry and hurt outburst. His words had felt true.
“Let’s go home and check it out,” he continued. He placed a hand firmly on Jude’s shoulder and directed him back the way they’d come. “Judging by the URL, it’s one of two things. And if we don’t see anything that points to Jordan, then we know where to find Anthony again. We’ll think of a more interesting way to lean on him for info.”
They walked a few blocks in silence. The cold wind cut through their clothes and bit at their exposed skin, but Snow was more worried about Jude. He could see him drawing into himself with each step.
“I think he’s right,” Jude said softly when they were nearly to the car.
“Anthony?”
Jude nodded. “I don’t know Jordan anymore. Not like I used to. I’m beginning to wonder if I ever really did. Maybe I just told myself I did so I wouldn’t feel guilty about being so wrapped up in work and my own life.”
Snow stopped and pulled Jude into his arms, not caring that they were standing in the middle of the sidewalk in the freezing cold. “You know Jordan. And he knows that you love him. It’s just that somewhere along the way he got into some shit and made some bad decisions. We all do that. We’ll figure this out together.”
Jude sighed, pressing his face into Snow’s shoulder. “I don’t know, Snow. I just don’t know.”Chapter 9Snow and Jude stood around the island in the kitchen, a bottle of Jack between them. Snow had splashed a couple of shots into a pair of tumblers when they got in and Jude had followed him. Now they stood there in an uncomfortable silence. He’d expected Jude to head straight to the computer in the office they’d set up in one of the bedrooms, but his lover had dragged his feet into the house and showed no problem with joining Snow in the kitchen.
They were afraid to pull up the website and face what they might find there.
Snow was pretty sure they wouldn’t just stumble across a video of Jordan being shot and beaten, instantly answering all their questions. Instead, it was going to be something that led them deeper into the rabbit hole, into a world they’d been sure couldn’t have possibly touched Jordan’s life.
Looking across the counter, his heart broke at Jude’s pale face and glassy eyes. He appeared to be worn down to his very core. Jude was running on empty from days of worry and frustration. But their first potential break, the first glimmer of truth, was likely to be something darker than either of them wanted to contemplate.
Throwing back the last of his whiskey, Snow set his glass down with a loud thunk. “Let’s just mentally prepare before we go in there. What do you think the site is?”
“Porn,” Jude said without hesitation.
“Gambling,” Snow shot back.
Jude lifted disbelieving eyes to Snow and shook his head.
“I’m not saying that it can’t be porn. Just that it could also be a gambling website.”
Jude sighed, his broad shoulders slumping. “Yeah, it could be a gambling site too. I know he likes to play poker. I guess he could have gotten in over his head.” Jude might have been saying the words, but Snow could tell by his tone that he wasn’t convinced at all.
“And if it’s porn, that’s not the end of the world. We have both met a number of people in the industry who are kind, intelligent, wonderful people. There’s nothing wrong with porn.”
Nodding, Jude took a deep, steadying breath. “No, you’re right. Porn and gambling aren’t the end of the world. Porn isn’t exactly something I expected Jordan to do if it’s that, but that’s okay if it is. We just want to get to the bottom of why he was hurt.”
“If you want, I can go check it out. I’ll report what I see,” Snow offered.