“I’ve got to be fair to you.” Rowe started to say that he didn’t know if he could ever care for Noah the way Noah seemed to care for him, but there would have been no truth to those words. He simply couldn’t face how easy it would be to fall for Noah. Standing there, he was already fighting the urge to brush his lips against Noah’s neck, to snuggle into his warmth, and not because he wanted to fuck the man—well, technically that was always there—but because he simply wanted to be close to Noah. He wanted to hear his laughter, be free to reach out and simply touch his hand, to ask him about his day because he just needed to hear his voice.
“Can I ask…” Noah started and then Rowe could hear him lick his lips, “Is it just the grieving thing or is it also the gay thing?”
A snort escaped Rowe. “Is it wrong that I wish the gay thing bothered me? That I’d feel better if it bothered me?” Rowe felt more than heard Noah’s laugh and it felt so good. The tension eased from Noah’s shoulders and his fingers shifted so they entwined with Rowe’s, locking them together so that Rowe could feel the heat gathering between their palms.
“You’re so screwed up,” Noah murmured, but there was a gentleness to his tone.
Rowe stepped back, but continued to hold Noah’s hand. “After a lifetime of pushing this down and being with only women, I feel like this,” he said, holding up their entwined hands, “should feel weird or awkward to me. But it doesn’t. It feels…good.”
He wanted to make this work. Give it an honest try because Noah deserved that.
They both did.Chapter 19“Shiver’s on fire!”
Noah was already on his feet before the final syllable Rowe shouted finished rolling through the dark bedroom. He’d been lying on his back, waiting for sleep to claim him, cursing ever opening his mouth because sex with Rowe would have definitely helped him pass out. But Rowe had been true to his word. They ate and watched TV. Rowe told him about the random emergency at work and made some jokes. It wasn’t hard to see Rowe was genuinely making an effort to get them back to their easy friendship, trying to heal the rift between them. By midnight, they went to their separate bedrooms and stayed there.
Until Rowe raced into his room—pants barely hanging onto his narrow hips and shirt clenched in his fist—to deliver his cryptic message. Noah dressed and grabbed weapons, trusting that he’d get more information once they were on the road.
They were in the truck and out of the neighborhood before he finally asked, “Shiver?”
Rowe swore and shoved his phone at Noah as he swerved around a car moving slower than Rowe’s ninety and slamming Noah into the passenger door. Tires squealed and horns blared, but they managed not to hit anyone. “Shiver is another of Lucas’s clubs. Gidget called hysterical and said she’s getting reports that both Shiver and Snow’s old house outside downtown are on fire.”
Noah stopped in the act of trying to get comfortable behind his seat belt again, phone clenched in his left hand. “Old house? He doesn’t live there?”
“Yeah, he sold it months ago. Living in Northern Kentucky with Jude—miles away. No idea if anyone is living there now.” He pointed as his phone. “Pull up my contacts. Call Ian, Snow, Jude, Andrei and Lucas. Keep fucking calling them until someone answers!” He hammered his horn and raced around a little yellow Fiat moving way too slow for Rowe’s liking. “It’s Lucas’s night to be at Shiver. He likes to be there on Saturday. But he might have left before the fire started. Call the boys and find out if anyone has heard from him.”
Cutting through downtown took another fifteen minutes. Noah growled softly to himself. Snow’s phone was going directly to voicemail, but the surgeon could have easily been working. Jude wasn’t answering and neither was Ian. Lucas’s phone went directly to voicemail. He put off trying Andrei as Rowe swore softly next to him. Black smoke billowed into the sky and traffic had come to a complete standstill.
Rowe pulled the car into a nearly full lot and parked. “We’re still two blocks away. Faster to hoof it.”
“Got your six,” Noah murmured, getting out of the car before Rowe even finished turning off the engine. He would follow Rowe into the fire and he would always have this man’s back. Particularly since someone had already taken a shot at Rowe at the last fire.
His heart gave a little stutter to see the crowd of fire trucks, ambulances, police cars, and people dressed in skimpy clubbing clothes outside the building. Bright flames and smoke poured from the two stories and roof. It was utter chaos. Everything within him screamed to get Rowe out of the area and back to the safety of the truck. That many people gathered closely with tall buildings at all sides—there were too many places for a shooter. But there was no way in hell he was going to get Rowe out of there until he was sure none of his friends were in danger.