I stayed up for a long time, wondering what it meant that I shared, if it somehow made it impossible to put my shields back up, if it maybe changed the way he saw me, even in a small way. My heart hurt at that idea. Because, fact of the matter was, I hadn’t given him almost anything at all. It was the cleanest piece of a giant, bloody, God-awful puzzle.
But before I could come to any kind of conclusions or decisions about how to move forth from then on, I was lulled into sleep feeling, for maybe the first time in my life, completely safe.ELEVENShaneI woke up early, as was my habit. Lea slept in, as was hers. At some point in her sleep, she mumbled “Fuck off” to some dream foe and literally kicked off of me to the far side of the bed. It was then I decided to take the time to get up, find her clothes from the night before, and wash and dry them, the power finally back on. I liked her in my clothes, but she would need something to wear when she, inevitably, demanded I take her back to her place.
I wasn’t stupid. Girls like her didn’t just change overnight. She wasn’t going to turn into a mushy chick who wanted to hang around my place and tell me about her hopes and dreams. She had softened the night before, likely because of some world-class sex and a feeling of connection. But when she woke back up and realized what she had given to me and what that could mean to her defenses, she would scramble to push me away again.
I was prepared for that.
I didn’t like it.
But I would deal.
Now that I knew she had some bad shit go down with men, I understood her attitude better. She didn’t trust herself to make a good decision with the opposite sex. And she wouldn’t respond to me trying to force my way in. She had too much of that. She needed patience and a bit of softness when she wasn’t in the mood to open up. And then she needed me to press when she was, even if she didn’t realize she was in the mood to share.
I wasn’t above using sex to get her there.
It seemed to be the only time she wasn’t hiding, wasn’t trying to push me away.
Why I was willing to put all that work in, yeah, that was beyond me. I was usually too busy getting inside a chick’s pussy to worry about what was going on in her head. All I can say is- something was different with Lea. And every interaction with her made me more sure she was worth the hassle. Hell, even the way she dismissed the hostess at Famiglia was a turn-on for me.
I just plain like the chick.
It wasn’t new and novel for me. I liked plenty of women over the years. But very rarely was that feeling attached to attraction. I didn’t fuck women I wanted to spend time with because I wasn’t ever interested in settling down. But Lea, I liked her. And I sure as hell wanted to keep burying inside her sweet pussy too.
So, never really being the type to over-analyze or deny myself something I wanted, I just decided to go with the flow, see where it took us.
My cell vibrated on the kitchen counter and I reached for it, seeing Fee’s number and picking up. “‘Sup, Fee?”
“I can’t get in touch with Lea,” she said, voice uncharacteristically hysterical. If Fee was anything, it was chill. Maybe she was a bit prickly and opinionated, but with her tragic past, not much got to her. “She was at work last night and I told her to leave and get home. She was supposed to call me as soon as she got in. She hasn’t called. Hunter went over to her apartment but there was no response at the door. Her car is still outside the office, but she’s nowhere in sight. I don’t know what the fuck to…”
“Fee,” I cut in, voice loud to be heard over her rambling.
“What?”
“I got her. She’s here.”
There was the barest of pauses before she made a weird shriek-sound. “She’s there? She was there overnight?”
“Yeah, Fee, she was here all night. Her car wouldn’t start and I was on my way home from Chaz’s when I saw her running down the street.”
“So you knight in shining armor’d her?” she asked and I could just picture the smile she had on her face. “I knew you guys couldn’t stay away from each other! Where is she? Can I talk to her?”
“She’s sleeping,” I said, looking over toward my bed to see her completely out of the covers, laying on her stomach, her leg cocked up, giving me a great view of her long legs. Her hair was bed-messy and my tee was just barely covering her ass. I realized right then that I would be a pretty fucking happy man to wake up to that view for a good long time.