"Thad..."
"Alright, listen," he said, leaning back against my bedroom doorway. "I want you to take a ride or fifty on that fine piece of masculinity. You earned it. You deserve to blaspheme the name of God while you get your lady business worked over for the first time in a decade. But that being said, you are my baby sister. He is a dangerous biker with a bunch of dangerous biker friends, so there is no way I am letting you take your fine ass into there without your big, scary brother to keep an eye on you. Now squeeze that round ass into those jeans, tie on that shirt, spritz on some perfume, and meet me at the door."
With that, he left me alone to do, well, just that. The top was white and flowy, but tied in the center of my stomach, showing off a bit more than a sliver of belly. I spritzed on the perfume, grabbed a pair of flats, and pretended like I was trying to talk myself out of it.
But, well, I wasn't.
I didn't want to.
If I was alone, I never would have worked up my courage to go.
But with Thaddeus there as backup? I wanted to go. I wanted to satisfy my curiosity. Maybe - just maybe - get to know Virgin just a little bit better. Even if the more rational side of me knew it was stupid. A non-starter. Doomed to fail.
It could go down in flames.
Brilliant, orgasm-filled flames.
It was funny how, when I was inside long enough, the urges went away. When there was no possibility for relief - no men to take it away, no privacy to take care of it yourself - your body kind of just shut it all down. But now that I was back out, it was back with a vengeance. And despite having used - when no one was home - the vibrator Thad had included in my basic necessities package until the thing damn near burned out on me, nothing seemed to ease the clawing, aching need, nothing would take away the oppressive weight on my lower belly, begging for an end to the torment.
I didn't just need an orgasm.
I needed touch after so long without.
I needed hands gliding over places that hadn't been grazed in far too long - shoulders, spine, lower back, hips, thighs.
I needed the feel of lips down the side of my neck, my belly, lower.
I needed the weight of a man on top of me, the feel of his hard lines on my softer ones, the scent of his skin on me, his words in my ear.
I needed a man who could give me an orgasm.
And if you were going to let yourself have a fling, wasn't it the smartest bet to go with someone who had what seemed like an immense amount of experience? Someone who was clearly a noncommittal sort so things never got confusing or grew roots.
I had enough roots that I would need to rip out if I went through with my plans for revenge.
"Fred, I'm not getting any younger over here," Thad called, snapping me out of my wandering thoughts. Grabbing my purse, I made my way out into the living room, finding Thad standing half out the door already.
"Oh my God," I snorted when we moved outside and - I could not be more serious (nor mortified) - when Thaddeus threw open a parasol. A gauzy, baby blue freaking parasol. Despite the fact that it was dark outside. "What are you shielding yourself from? The moon?" I asked as he twirled it on his shoulder.
"Look like a poster child for a passive gay man, right?" he asked, suddenly grabbing the base of the handle with both hands - one staying put, the other yanking outward. And I'd be damned if a long, lethal-looking knife didn't come out in his fist. "Looks can be deceiving," he added, popping it back in. "Here," he added, reaching in his pocket to produce a small pocket knife. "Stick this in your pocket. Or in your bra. You should have room," he added with a smirk.
"Watch what you say to a woman holding a sharp object," I warned, turning it at him. "You could be missing a part of you that you really hold near and dear."
"Listen to you, Shawshank. Threatening to make a Eunuch outta me. Weren't you the girl who almost fainted when Colson broke his leg?"
"His bone was sticking out of his skin!" I shot back as we started walking. Even just the memory made a shiver course through me. I could never unsee that.
"Oh, damn. Don't even gotta go inside to get a taste of the mancandy," Thad declared as we walked up to the gates of The Henchmen compound where a duo of men in what almost looked like military gear with semi-automatic guns strapped around their backs stood.