"Did you run that by Reign?" Sugar asked with a raised brow that said he knew I hadn't, he knew I wouldn't, he knew Reign would hand me my ass like he had the last time.
"Just tell 'em not to look for me if V gets me," I offered. "I've slithered out of worse situations before," I added as I moved to stand. "The leashes in the room with 'em?" I asked Rey as Charlie lunged at the watch on my wrist as I passed, being a fan of all things shiny and breakable.
"Yeah. Thank you. I really appreciate it."
"He needs a long walk to clear his head of thoughts of his lover girl," Lenny told the others, but pitched her voice just loud enough that I could hear as I walked away.
I let that one slide, knowing if I said anything, anything at all, that it would only open up the discussion again.
So I found the leashes, clipped them onto the collars of Rey's five dogs, all various forms of hideous and deformed, stole out the back door, and made my way down the main area of Navesink Bank, most of the stores shuttered given the late hour.
It was an especially stupid move to walk alone when there was no one around to be a witness if you got taken out, or abducted. But I'd left my cut at the compound, and had taken a bit of a roundabout way between buildings before I resurfaced on the main drag.
It was the first time in weeks that I felt like I could pull in a proper breath, that my lungs were fully inflated.
Muscles that I hadn't even noticed were tense slowly loosened up, making me feel lighter than usual.
It was amazing what a little breath of freedom could do.
I still snuck out at times.
Headed home.
Just to get a couple hours to myself.
But I tried not to piss off Reign too much. He had enough on his plate. He'd taken a bit of a chance when he had taken me on in the first place.
I just did it when I couldn't take it another minute.
And, yeah, as fucking ridiculous as it was, to see if she was back.
But she never was.
What little mail she got piled up until I started taking it in.
I'd have thought something maybe happened to her. But her bills must have been getting paid. Our landlord was all about his bottom line. He had the apartment next to mine on the market just hours after the guy living there OD'd on the shite he kept sticking up his nose. If Lou wasn't paying her bills, there'd be someone new in her place already.
So, she was alright.
Out there somewhere doing her badass thing.
And I spent way too much fucking time wondering what that thing was. If she was wearing a little black dress while she did it. Where the fuck she bought roofies. Who her contact was for illegal weapons. If she threatened to cut anyone else's hands off this week.
It was fucking asinine to be thinking about her - this woman I just spent an interesting day with. But I couldn't seem to shake the thoughts either.
The girls were right; I hadn't gotten laid.
I'd sort of chalked it up to all that crazy shite with V and then the lockdown.
But, hell, everyone else managed to get laid if they really wanted to.
I simply hadn't put in the effort.
For months.
And that simply wasn't like me.
So maybe they were also right about the reason.
Because who I really wanted to fall into bed with was Lou.
And maybe a part of me realized that no one else was going to work.
Crazy.
But possible.
And wasn't that just some fucked up shite?
"Smell some hot tail or something, One-eye?" I asked, giving his leash a little more give so he could surge ahead to find whatever scent he was on.
I didn't know his name.
Any of them actually.
Just the bird.
So I called them by their most distinguishing features. One-eye, Tripod, etc.
I was so busy watching him that I almost missed it.
Almost.
The light in the shop did nothing.
Paine's place was always open late. It was a general rule that most tattoo decisions were done at night. After a few drinks. Without properly thinking it through.
And I'd looked over one time too many to see asscrack or man tit.
I generally averted my eyes to save them from burning.
But something caught my gaze.
A flash of shining brown hair.
It could have been anyone. A random chick from a bar. A guy who had dreams of rock stardom.
But something told me to look.
Giving the leashes a small tug to indicate I was stopping, I turned back.
And there she fucking was.
After all this time.
Back in Navesink Bank.
Sitting in Paine's chair, staring up at the ceiling as he bent over her with the gun.