The office with Maze, spending more time bullshiteting than getting actual work done.
At the salon with Kennedy, enjoying the fuck out of their over-the-top conversations that went sexual ninety-percent of the time.
I'd even been here many nights, taking over where Reeve would normally have relieved Roan in the glass room. Even though I knew it was less because he didn't want to do it, and more because he wanted to spend time with his girl, as new and novel as that situation was.
Pretty Rey with her menagerie of animals, kind heart, and unnatural fucking love for Brussels sprouts.
I mean, seriously, the woman snuck them into a smoothie she'd made me once. Like I wouldn't notice it was green when the berries implied it should have been red.
But she had one of those soft souls, so I chugged the damn thing, agreeing - and lying through my teeth - when she declared See, you don't taste the green at all!
I wouldn't begrudge the man his time with his woman. The poor fuck had earned some good, some soft, some sweet after the shitestorm he had been through, the years he had punished himself for it after.
Even if I didn't like the glass room.
Even if those long nights in a room by myself gave me nothing but time to think.
And for a man like me, with a past like mine, thinking would normally be a torturous thing.
It was that.
Except it wasn't my father, my childhood, my time in the basement, the years of blood and pain after that invaded my mind.
No.
It was fucking her.
That woman.
With the sass, the face, the eyes, the mouth, the ass, the moves, the whole bloody package.
The woman who had somehow subjected me to endless ribbing from Lenny. And, because of her, the other men. Namely Sugar and Roderick, with the occasional comment from Virgin as well.
"Haven't seen her in months, Len."
"I know!" she said, smiling big. "That's what is so great. You spend a day with the woman, and you're smitten even now. Months after. Without even having seen her when she disappeared into the night. To, I imagine, get shot of you. It's amazing."
"Ya and me, we got different definitions of amazing. And 'smitten' is pushin' it."
"You went on for like seven solid minutes about her lower back dimples."
I probably had.
Drunk.
Which should have meant it wouldn't get drudged up again.
She shoulda known that.
Working in a bar and all.
"That was months ago."
"Yeah, but I also have it on good authority that you haven't fucked anyone since then either. Which, as we all know, is not like you. You're no choirboy like Reeve was. You fuck anyone with an adequate cup size and a pulse."
"Not true," I said, shaking my head as I looked down at her. "I ain't never discriminated based on tit size," I finished, making her snort-laugh at me.
"Tell me I'm wrong. That you've fucked someone."
I hadn't.
She knew I hadn't.
And I had no good reason for it either.
So what if I had a missed opportunity with Lou?
That didn't mean I didn't need to dip my wick. It didn't mean I had to act faithful to the memory of someone who clearly had no trouble moving on.
"Where could she be for months anyway?" Bethany asked, dropping down with a giant bowl. "Don't get too excited," she told me with a knowing smirk. "Rey made a giant 'happy salad' for dinner."
"The fuck is a 'happy salad?'" Sugar asked.
"Pretty sure there is nothing happy about a salad," Roderick said at almost the exact same time.
"It means it is loaded with vegetables. And red lentil pasta. And chickpeas. Her homemade dressing is amazing though. Give it a shot."
"Yeah, I mean, I get that she chases skips," Lenny agreed. "But four months really seems to be pushing it, y'know?"
"And don't forget that she just got an assload of money off that last skip," Roderick piped in. "She wouldn't really need to get on another job so fast."
"Maybe she's taking a vacation," Rey piped in, walking out with Charlie, her snowy white cockatoo, on her shoulder. "Did Bethany tell everyone about the salad?"
"Ya can count me in, sweetheart," I offered, glad for a change in topics, even if it was something as lame as food. "I haven't had anything green yet today. I know, to ya, that is damn near blasphemous."
She offered me a small smile, still not sure of her footing here, as much as she tried to fit in. "I'm not that bad," she objected, though she knew she was.
"Hey, you are trying to make sure we all have long, healthy lives," Bethany told her, giving her a smile. The two couldn't claim to be fast friends, being different women, but Bethany always tried to bring her into the fold a bit.
"Ya need me to take the dogs on a walk tonight?" I asked, knowing she worried about them not getting enough exercise, even though we had the yard for them to wander around in.