My mood was effectively ruined. Screw you, Caine West, I’m going to have a good time with Davis even if it physically hurts. I took a few minutes in the car to settle myself before going into the restaurant. Looking up at the sign, I realized Davis had picked a place we’d been to together during our short period as a couple. Roberto’s had incredible food and was romantic, with an olden-days type of feel. I wondered if he’d picked a spot with those memories on purpose.
Inside, I looked around and spotted him sitting at a table in the back corner. It was exactly where we’d sat the last time we were here. If there was any doubt that Davis was trying to rekindle the mood we’d once experienced, the table he’d arrived early to secure confirmed his intentions. It was actually sort of sweet of him to put so much thought into where we had dinner. That was Davis—sweet and thoughtful. He was the polar opposite of Caine’s bitter and thoughtless.
I had no idea why I was even comparing the two men. It didn’t feel fair to Davis, even though he’d win in pretty much any category I could scribble down on paper and analyze. The problem was, Caine made me feel something that couldn’t be categorized—something I couldn’t even really describe. And for a reason I didn’t quite understand, that stupid feeling trumped all of the awesomeness of Davis.
But this afternoon had been a real eye-opener. I’d practically thrown myself at a man who was attracted to me physically, but hated that he was. No good could come of tempting a man to act who had no interest in anything more than sex and would also immediately regret giving in to his temptation.
I sighed and vowed to enjoy my evening and focus on the man sitting across from me.
As I approached the table, Davis’ smile brought back all the good times we’d had over the years. He stood as I approached and pulled me into a giant hug. It felt so good. His arms wrapped tight around my waist as he buried his face in my hair and inhaled deeply.
“I missed you,” he said. “You always smell so good.”
I didn’t realize how much I’d missed being held. Yes, I missed the sexual gratification of being with a man…but being held and feeling wanted felt pretty damn amazing. Down deep, I knew I was needy after Caine’s rejection, but I buried that and allowed myself to enjoy Davis holding me anyway. He took a long time before he released me, and when he did, he stepped back, holding my hands so he could look at me.
“Wow. You look incredible, Rach.”
“Thank you.”
We sat, and Davis just kept staring.
A nervous giggle snuck out. “You’re staring at me like I have two heads.”
His eyes had such a tenderness as he smiled. “I was just thinking…remember that picture we took at my graduation? The one where I had on the gown and you were wearing my cap crooked with a goofy smile?”
“I think so.”
“Well, I printed it out, and I have it on my dresser, and…” He trailed off.
“What?”
“Nothing. I don’t want to scare you off before the appetizers even come.”
I laughed. “Don’t be silly. What were you going to say?”
Davis looked me in the eyes. “I was going to say sometimes I wake up and look at it, but it doesn’t hold a candle to seeing you in person.” His eyes flickered to my lips. “I miss your goofy grin. That’s all.”
There was so much warmth in his gaze. It seemed to be contagious because I felt my insides turn a little mushy. Why had I thought tonight was a bad idea? In that moment, I couldn’t think of a single reason.
The waitress interrupted to take our drink order. Davis ordered his usual Tanqueray and tonic, and he looked to me. “Diet Coke?”
I was feeling rebellious tonight. “I’ll have a Tanqueray and tonic, too.”
Once the waitress disappeared, Davis lifted a brow. He knew my stance on drinking. He also had to remember that the one night we drank too much together, we wound up in bed.
“Is tonight a special occasion?”
“I think it is. We haven’t seen each other in a while.”
“It’s been way too long.”
By the time I finished half of my drink, my shoulders had dropped, and the muscles in my neck were a lot looser. We’d started to settle into the old Davis-and-Rachel comfortableness. I gave him an update about my classes, and he asked how my sister was. Never liking to talk about myself too much, I steered the conversation back to him.
“So what’s new with you? How’s your job?”
“Good. Got a little promotion—a bigger territory.”
“Wow. Congratulations. I knew you’d do great. Do you get a big fancy corner office now?”
“Nah, I spend three-quarters of my time on the road. But they did give me a better car allowance, so I got myself a fun new car to enjoy while I’m doing all that driving.”
“What did you get?”
“The Audi A4. It’s a manual transmission. Makes for a fun drive on long hauls with hills.”
My brain was being unfair. It immediately conjured up the memory of Caine driving his little car—the way his hand gripped that gear shifter. Such an odd thing to have gotten me all hot and bothered, even odder that I shifted in my seat remembering it.
I sipped my drink. “You’ll have to take me for a ride sometime.”
“I’d like that. You can even take it for a spin, if you want.”
“Thank you,” I scoffed. “Caine wouldn’t let me drive his car. Thought I’d ruin his precious clutch.”
“Caine?”
“Professor West. My thesis advisor.”
Davis seemed contemplative for a few seconds and then nodded. “That’s right. You mentioned him the other night at O’Leary’s. You still working six days a week over there?”
“Actually, not the last few weeks. Between teaching and student extra-help sessions, faculty meetings, and writing lesson plans, I’ve had to cut down a bit.”
Over dinner, we chatted away like long-lost friends. Davis was good company, and our familiarity gave me a sense of comfort—Davis had always given me a sense of comfort. When our conversation came to a lull, I could see he was thinking. It looked like he was debating saying something.
“Spit it out,” I said.
He chuckled. “You could always tell when something was on my mind.”