He sighed. “I just… there’s more to that night, Dillan. Way more. Don’t you find it odd that Delanie and Booth can’t remember a thing?”
“I just remember Kerrie giving us both beers,” Delanie said softly. “After that, I don’t remember anything.”
I did, honestly. Always had.
The only thing was, talking about it was painful. And I knew that my sister felt badly about what had happened. I didn’t like to rub salt in the wound, because my sister was my best friend. She would never, not ever, do anything that would cause me any pain.
We were like two peas in a pod.
We needed each other.
Delving into that meant that I had to put my feelings aside… and I hated to say it, but sometimes I was selfish. Sometimes I just wanted to be fucking pissed about it.
“So you’re saying I shouldn’t have put my feelings aside and should have questioned this years ago when it happened?” I asked.
He shrugged. “I can admit to being pissed myself. My brother? He’s a stubborn fool, though. Despite my trying to get him to talk about it, he’s been pretty clammed up about the whole thing. I guess, maybe, I just expected you to push it a little bit more. Girls are able to get away with more shit than men.”
I snickered and kicked a rock with my toe.
It stung, but I chose not to show it.
I was an ol’ pro at hiding my pain.
“You don’t think that it’ll be dumb as hell?” I wondered. “To bring something up that’ll just hurt both of them?”
He blew out a frustrated breath.
“When Booth went down yesterday? He was… fucked up. He kept talking about you. And Asa. And goddamn, I thought he was going to die.” He scrubbed his hand over his face, looking thoughtful. “If you and him are going to happen? I think you need to figure this out. I think you need to push it. Because a relationship can’t be built on a lie.”
He was right, of course.
Which was how I ended up back at Booth’s place just hours later after having thought about what Bourne had said. Well, more like obsessed.
Things weren’t right.
I’d always thought that, of course. But giving myself the permission to dwell on it? Yeah, needless to say, I needed to talk to Booth.
It was well past eight when I left the house.
Almost nine when I got there with food—I’d stopped by the store to get some of my favorite comfort food. A deli rotisserie chicken, some gooey macaroni and cheese, and a twelve pack of King’s Hawaiian rolls. I finished up my feast with a gallon of sweet tea, then headed for Booth’s.
Grabbing my spoils, I ran for the door. I didn’t even get the chance to knock before he was opening it for me.
“What’s the rush, Dillan?” he asked, grinning wickedly.
I once again arrived at his place, unscheduled, and found him shirtless.
I eyed the bruises, seeing that they were a much more putrid color of purple, and shook my head.
“They look bad,” I said softly, not answering his question.
“What are you doing here?” he asked softly. “Don’t you need your sleep?”
I did.
But I also didn’t have to work in the morning, so it was okay that I wasn’t in bed yet… or anywhere near planning to go to bed.
“I have to ask you a question,” I said. “I have a really bad feeling, and I need you to talk me through it.”
He frowned but stepped back, allowing me into his sanctum again.
“Come on in,” he said. “Asa’s already asleep. Can we go out to the back porch?”
I nodded, allowing him to lead the way.
He made a pit stop in the kitchen, and picked up two cups, two forks, some paper plates, and a roll of paper towels.
I warmed inside.
He pulled the table that he’d rested his feet on the night before closer, and together we started to divvy up the food.
“This is a feast,” he said. “I had a sandwich, but damn if I’m not hungry all over again.”
I snorted. “It’s kind of hard to pass this up.”
I didn’t bother bringing up my problems until both of us were done eating.
My phone, which was in the Walmart sack that I’d brought inside, started to light up, indicating a call.
I grimaced and ignored it.
“Who’s that?” he asked, seeing the grimace.
I sighed. “Kerrie.”
His brows rose. “Kerrie? I haven’t seen him in years. How’s he doing?”
I took a big bite of my Hawaiian roll and shrugged. “He’s good. I don’t talk to him all that much anymore, seeing as he likes to push the boundaries of our friendship.”
He grinned.
“Did you know that the night that you and my sister…” I hesitated, roll halfway to my mouth. “That my father had decided to arrange a marriage between her and Kerrie?”
He halted, roll halfway to his mouth.