I got up and followed her upstairs, where I found her on her side of the bed. The shaking of her shoulders was a good indicator of what she was doing. Feeling like the biggest asshole, I moved inside and slid into bed behind her. Gemma could be a tough fighter, but her core was mushy soft. Wrapping my arms around her from behind, I kissed her neck. “Don’t cry, Gem. I hate seeing your tears. They feel like a punch in my heart.”
She didn’t say anything, only stared stubbornly ahead.
“Our father didn’t show emotion. He probably didn’t have them, just like Nino. Only my brother isn’t a sadistic psychopath… well, to the people he cares about.” I paused. Taking a trip down memory lane was something I avoided at all costs. “Remo and Nino were never the touchy-feely kind of kids, but I was a horrible cuddler and too sensitive for the type of surroundings I was born into. A bit like Adamo, only that I got rid of that annoying trait very quickly.” Gemma had stopped crying and was all ears now. “Problem was my father would have rather killed me than shown any kind of affection, and my mother did try to kill me…Remo and Nino had their own demons to battle and once we were in boarding school surrounded by strangers and potential enemies, I learned quickly to hide my emotions from them. They reported back to our father and probably other parts of our traitorous family. Later when my brothers and I were on the run, hiding my emotions behind sarcasm and humor was a good way to help Remo. He wasn’t supposed to worry about me. He had enough on his plate, so I used my sarcasm as my armor. That way, he could focus on what was really important: winning our territory back. It’s become second nature, Gem, using sarcasm and jokes to get out of emotional situations. It doesn’t mean I don’t have emotions. It just means I’m crappy at showing them.”
“Yes, you are.” She turned around in my hold, facing me with her puffy face. I kissed the red tip of her nose like I’d done before she was really mine. “So you have emotions for me?”
I dragged her closer. “Yes, I have emotions for you. Plenty of them.”
“I have emotions for you, too,” she said teasingly.
I kissed her. “One day, I’ll get my act together, I promise.”
“Everyone’s scared of something.”
“Like you of my dick.”
She narrowed her eyes, then she shook her head with a laugh. “All right.”
I stroked her cheek. “Don’t take this the wrong way and I know it isn’t the perfect moment to bridge the subject, but why do you avoid giving me head?”
“I’m not scared,” she said stubbornly.
I cocked one eyebrow. “Who’s lying about their emotions now?”
“I’m not!” She sat up with a cute growl, scowling at me. “You’re baiting me so I’ll do it, right?”
“Never,” I said.
She reached for my sweats and I helped her pull them down. My dick sprang free, already waiting for his special treatment. Gemma moved a bit closer, and I almost laughed at the look of concentration on her face. “Shut up,” she muttered.
“I didn’t say anything.”
Gemma stared at my tattoo as she lowered her head. “I’m not sure if I like it. Being watched by that bull freaks me out.”
“He and I love seeing you so close to my cock.”
Gemma rolled her eyes.
“If you’re scared, you don’t—” Her lips closed around my tip and my words died in a groan. Seeing Gemma’s pouty lips around my dick was almost enough to make me come. Gemma’s inexperience quickly showed when her teeth got in the way as she tried to suck me. I held back, not wanting to make her insecure by giving instructions, but soon things became a bit too toothy.
I hissed when Gemma’s teeth scratched me again and gently pressed her neck to get her in a different angle.
“Don’t chew on it. I’m not averse to some rough play, but my dick’s not a bone.”
Gemma wrenched her head back, face reddening. Before I could grab her, she jumped out of bed.
I almost laughed until I saw the tears in her eyes. I leaped out of bed and wrapped my arm around her waist from behind. She twisted in my hold and tried to shove me away. I only tightened my hold.
“Are you crying because you suck at sucking?” I teased her. It was the fucking wrong thing to do.
She kicked back against my shin, but I didn’t let go of her.
“I hate that the girls you’ve been with knew how to give you head, how to please you and I’m a loser who can’t get it right.”
Fuck, was she serious? I almost laughed again but stifled the sound. “Gemma,” I said. “You’ve never had a cock in your mouth, thank the fucking gods. Can I tell you a secret?”