Hanna flipped to the next page of the newspaper. The obituaries, good. She pretended to be fascinated by an article about Ethel Norris, eighty-five, choreographer of a modern dance troupe in Philadelphia. She’d died yesterday in her sleep.
“I’m finding this difficult too.” Kate’s voice shook. “I miss my dad. I wish he were still alive. No offense to Tom, but it’s weird to see my mom with someone else. And it’s weird to be all happy for both of them, just like that. They don’t think about us, do they?”
Hanna was so outraged, she wanted to throw Kate’s melon across the kitchen. Everything out of Kate’s mouth was so scripted, it was like she’d downloaded some perfect feel bad for me speech off the Internet.
Kate took a breath. “I’m sorry about what I did to you in Philly, but I had other stuff going on that day. Stuff I shouldn’t have taken out on you.” There was a little clink as she set down her fork. “Something really scary happened to me right before that dinner. I hadn’t told my mom yet, and I was sure she was going to lose it.”
Hanna frowned, glancing at Kate for a split second. Trouble?
Kate pushed her plate away. “I was going out with this guy, Connor, last summer. One night, one of the last weekends before school started, things went kind of…far.” Her forehead wrinkled, and her bottom lip started to tremble. “He broke up with me the next day. About a month later, I went to the gynecologist, and there were…complications.”
Hanna widened her eyes. “Were you pregnant?”
Kate shook her head quickly. “No. It was…something else.”
Hanna was pretty sure that if her mouth gaped open any farther, it would graze the top of the table. Her brain raced a million miles a minute, trying to figure out what complications meant. An STD? A third ovary? A funny-looking nipple? “So…are you okay?”
Kate shrugged. “I am now. But it sucked for a while. It was really scary.”
Hanna narrowed her eyes. “Why are you telling me all this?”
“Because I wanted to explain what was going on,” Kate admitted. Her eyes glistened with tears. “Look, please don’t tell anyone what I just told you. My mom knows, but Tom doesn’t.”
Hanna took a sip of her coffee. She was floored by Kate’s words—and also a little relieved. Perfect Kate had screwed up. And never in a zillion years did Hanna think she’d ever see Kate cry. “I won’t say anything,” Hanna said. “We all have issues.”
Kate let out a big, dubious sniff. “Right. What’s your issue?”
Hanna set down her polka-dotted coffee cup, debating. If nothing else, she could learn whether Ali had told Kate her secret. “Fine. But you probably already know it. The first time it happened was that time Alison and I came to Annapolis.”
She peeked at Kate, trying to gauge if she understood. Kate poked her fork into a piece of honeydew, shifting her eyes uneasily around the room. “You’re still doing that?” she asked quietly. Hanna felt a mixture of thrill and disappointment—so Ali had run back to the patio and told her.
“Not really,” Hanna mumbled.
They were silent for a moment. Hanna stared out the window at a big snowdrift in the neighbors’ backyard. Even though it was the ass-crack of dawn, the bratty six-year-old twins were out in the snow, pitching icy snowballs at squirrels. Then Kate cocked her head quizzically. “I meant to ask you. What’s up with you and Naomi and Riley?”
Hanna gritted her teeth. “Why are you asking me? Aren’t they your brand-new BFFs?”
Kate thoughtfully pushed a strand of chestnut hair behind her ears. “You know, I think they want to be friends. Maybe you should give them a chance.”
Hanna snorted. “Sorry, I don’t talk to girls who insult me to my face.”
Kate leaned forward on her elbows. “They probably say that stuff because they’re jealous of you. If you were nice to them, I bet they’d be nice back. And think about it—if we join up with them, we could be unstoppable.”
Hanna raised an eyebrow. “We?”
“Face it, Hanna.” Kate’s eyes danced. “You and I would totally rule their group.”
Hanna blinked. She gazed at the hanging rack over the kitchen island, which held a bunch of All-Clad pots and pans Hanna’s mother had bought a few years ago at Williams-Sonoma. Ms. Marin had left most of her personal belongings behind when she left for Singapore, and Isabel had had no problem claiming them as her own.
Kate definitely had a point. Naomi and Riley were insecure to the core—they had been ever since Alison DiLaurentis had dropped them for seemingly no reason in sixth grade and decided to be friends with Hanna, Spencer, Aria, and Emily instead. It certainly would be nice to have a clique again—especially one she could rule.
“Okay. I’m in,” Hanna decided.
Kate grinned. “Awesome.” She raised her orange juice glass in a toast. Hanna clinked it with her coffee mug. They both smiled and sipped. Then Hanna glanced back down at the newspaper, which was still open in front of her. Her eyes went right to an ad for vacation packages to Bermuda. All your dreams will come true, the ad copy assured her.
They’d better.
12
IT’S ALL JUST A MATTER OF PERSPECTIVE
Early Wednesday evening, Aria and Mike sat down at Rabbit Rabbit, the Montgomery family’s favorite vegetarian restaurant. The room smelled like a mix of basil, oregano, and soy cheese. A Regina Spektor song played loudly over the stereo, and the place was bustling with families, couples, and kids her age. After Ian’s chilling release and the new A note yesterday, it felt good to be surrounded by so many people.