There were people who liked living alone, having few obligations to other people. That wasn’t Ross—and it wasn’t Tony, either.
As long ago as Ross had lost his wife, he still missed her. He’d never said as much, but Tony knew he would till the day he died.
Tony gave a humorless laugh. Yes, he was an idiot. He’d run like a jackrabbit when he should have been holding on tight. He could be with Beth right now instead of being home alone, restless—and worried because she was also home alone.
The family stuff—it was something they’d have to work on. Tony couldn’t believe he’d simmered so long instead of sitting down with his mother and saying, “I love you all, but I need to set some boundaries.” Why had he had to mow Eloisa’s half-brown lawn, when Carlos was due home in only a day or two? Most of his sisters had husbands. Except in rare circumstances, they shouldn’t need him as anything but a brother. Tony suspected that, half the time, Mamá had used him to make those men feel inadequate, and he’d let her. For that matter, having him showing up the second any of his sisters expressed the slightest need kept them from finding solutions themselves. Tony doubted that had been his mother’s intention, but he couldn’t be positive. She was a controlling woman. With so many children, she’d probably had to become one, but somehow she hadn’t gotten the memo about backing off when your children became adults. Nudging Mamá that way wouldn’t be a bad thing, not for any of them. Eloisa, for sure, would appreciate it.
The fact that he’d let his resentment build instead of talking to her suggested he hadn’t been thinking like an adult himself. He wasn’t proud to know he’d reverted to a defiant sixteen-year-old without realizing that’s what he was doing. There was nothing like coming home.
He finally checked the locks, turned out the lights and went to his bedroom. Stripping, he took his second shower for the day, keeping the water tepid. He stayed under the stream for a long time, thinking about Beth. Knowing he had to talk to her, apologize, beg if he had to, but feeling uncertain about the outcome. He remembered her accepting his invitation to dinner even after he’d chickened out once. He could hear what she said, word for word, see the seriousness in her hazel eyes.
But, Tony? If this is some kind of trick, or you back off again, that’s it.
He brushed his teeth and padded to bed, where sleep was slow to come.
* * *
THURSDAY, WHEN EMILY hadn’t called, Beth tried her. Of course, she didn’t answer. No point in leaving another message.
Between appointments, Beth kept trying. She even phoned the chiropractor’s office, where Emily worked.
“I’m sorry,” she was told. “Ms. Marshall books appointments three days a week—Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.”
“Oh, right. I’m sorry. I’d forgotten which days she worked.”
Emily also filled in at several other places, which Beth called, but nobody was sure where she was today.
What if her threat to kill herself had been real? Oh, dear God, what if she had?
Hyperventilating, Beth didn’t know what to do. Driving around town hunting for her sister wouldn’t help. Matt, she decided.
“What?” he said, after she reached him. “No, don’t be ridiculous. I talked to her last night. She’s still mad, but swinging around to thinking it wouldn’t hurt to talk to someone like you suggested, especially if you’d pay for it.”
“I offered to help pay for it.”
“Come on, you know Emily.”
Her whole body sagged as the fear vanished with a poof, leaving her muscles weak. “I hope you re-inforced my message.”
“Sure, I did. Meant to call and tell you that you surprised me. It’s way past time, Bethie.”
She’d have been annoyed, except…he sounded gentle, the way Tony did sometimes. “We’re changing. All of us.”
“That’s good.”
“Have you talked to Dad? This has been really hard for him, you know.”
“You sound like Ashley,” her brother muttered.
“Listen to her.”
He grunted. “I’ll think about it. And you need to think about moving in with us until the cops catch Mighty Casey.”