THIRTEEN
BILLIE
WHEN I FIRST HEARD THE noise, my hands slapped against my ears, my fingers not nearly thick enough to block out the sound. Nothing had ever been that loud before. Not fireworks, not the gun range, not even the hardest crack of thunder.
This was different than any of those. It was a grinding, screaming combination. Metal on metal. Speed mixed with force. The plane was shaking. Dipping. Each major shift in altitude caused my stomach to flip.
It was happening every few seconds, the coffee and mimosa threatening to come up.
As the sound got louder, my body shaking even harder, I tucked my legs to my chest and pressed my elbows together, my arms now blocking most of my face. I didn’t know where the noise was coming from. If something was about to fall or come flying at us. If we were about to just drop from the sky.
Oh God.
“Jared,” I cried.
I didn’t know why I’d said his name. It didn’t make me feel better. I couldn’t even hear myself saying it, and there was no way he could hear me.
When I ran out of air, my chest heaved for oxygen.
I couldn’t inhale.
Too much fear was pulsing through me.
All I could do was tighten my body inside this ball I’d formed and squeeze my ears with my palms and shout, “Jared.” I yelled it over and over, waiting for an answer, waiting for some relief.
Waiting for it all to stop.
But it didn’t.
It got worse.
And that was when I felt him.
It was just a squeeze of his fingers on my arm, but it was a grip I felt through my whole body, and that was what I concentrated on until the noise stopped.
At first, I thought my ears were lying. I thought my eardrums had burst, and I’d gone deaf. But then Jared was pulling my arms apart, and his hands were on me as he was examining me.
“Are you all right?” he asked.
There was ringing in my ears. Through it, I still heard him, but it was tough.
I shook my head. “No.”
“You’re hurt?”
I repeated the action, hoping the sound would stop. “I don’t think so.”
He reached past me, shoving the blind all the way to the top, so he could see out the window.
“What’s happening to us?” I asked him.
I didn’t know what I was looking for, but as I glanced through the Plexiglas, I saw nothing alarming—no objects, no damage, not even a dark cloud.
“I don’t know,” he said, looking at the other side of the plane.
I glanced at the passengers across from us. Vomit covered the woman’s shirt. The man’s face was white as fresh tofu. Things were rolling down the aisle. Several of the overhead bins had opened, and luggage had spilled out.
The plane dipped again, and without the noise, I was able to hold on to something other than my ears. One hand went to the armrest, and the other gripped Jared as I was thrust into the side of him.
“Everyone, take your seats,” a flight attendant said over the intercom.
It felt like we were a rock skipping across the surface of the ocean, each dip trying to suck us in. The plane would shudder its way through another pocket, fighting the air, and we’d drop and rise again.
My nails were driving into Jared’s forearm. I couldn’t stop. He wasn’t telling me to. He wasn’t even acknowledging what I was doing to him.
“What the fuck is happening?” I cried. “Why aren’t they telling us anything?”
“I don’t think they know.”
The woman behind me was sobbing, each shift in pressure causing her to gasp. She was going to start hyperventilating any second.
So was I.
The space inside our row wasn’t big enough. The seats were closing in. The air was gone.
I couldn’t breathe.
I could barely hold on.
“Something hit one of the engines,” Jared said as he looked at me.
I didn’t know what that meant.
Can a plane survive with one engine like a person can live with only one kidney?
“How do you know?” I asked him, holding the armrest underhand when we shot over another pocket.
“I can see it smoking.”
Oh God.
“Jared …” I swallowed as we went over another bump. “Tell me we’re going to be all right.”
The intercom came on before he had a chance to respond. “This is your captain speaking. We’re going to have to make an emergency landing. Everyone, stay in your seats with your seat belts fastened. Please try and remain calm. We’ll notify you when we have more information.”