I walk through the crowded hallway of the school and see her coming toward me. She has her eyes down staring at her cell, typing away. Probably talking to Bones. I haven’t seen her since I kissed her at the frat party last weekend. When I was ready to go all the way and she changed her mind.
I purposely step in front of her, making her run into me. “Oh, sorry … Titan?” She looks up at me.
“Hey, Em. Can we talk?”
She pushes her hair behind her ear. “I can’t …”
“It’ll only take a second.” I grab her arm and yank her into the nearest classroom that I know is vacant this time of day. I shut the door behind me and lock the door.
“Titan, I don’t have time.”
I grab her arm, yank her to me and press my lips to hers. She opens up for me immediately and moans into my mouth. My hands find her hair and I deepen the kiss. She tastes like a cherry lollipop.
But she pulls away too soon. “Titan, we can’t,” she whispers, licking her lips.
“Because you love Bones?” I question.
“No.” She runs her hands through her tangled hair. “We’re not like that.”
“So you’re just his fuck?” I know what they are, but I want to hear her say it. I want her to admit that what they have isn’t what we could have.
Her eyes narrow on me. “No.”
“Then what the fuck is it?” I snap, getting irritated.
“I don’t have to explain it to you,” she growls. “It’s none of your business. And why do you care so much? He’s your best friend; you shouldn’t want to fuck me.”
“Because I know that he doesn’t give a shit about you,” I say.
Her face falls, and her eyes sadden. Shit!
“Em, that’s not what I meant.” He doesn’t love her, no, but he does care about her. She’s the only woman in the world that he gives the slightest fuck about. He always talks shit on Grave and his drug problem, but Emilee is his drug. He can’t quit her.
“And you do?” she asks, arching a brow.
I clamp my mouth shut because I’m not sure what to say. How to make her understand. Does she think I watch her and follow her around for nothing? She’s right. I’m not supposed to want her. Not like this. Not this way.
“That’s what I thought,” she states, and I step out of the way, letting her out of the room and out of my life.
“What are you thinking about?” she asks me.
I let out a long breath. “Nothing.”
“It’s not nothing. I can feel your heart race.”
I run a hand down my face. “You. Me.” I pause. “Bones.”
She rubs circles on my chest with the tips of her fingers but stops when I mention him. She sits up, the black silk sheet falling off her chest, and stares down at me. “Are you mad at me? For what we did?”
“No.” I sit up as well. “I told you I was okay with it. I wouldn’t lie to you.”
“It’s just …” She bites her bottom lip.
“Can I ask you something?” She nods. “Why did you guys stop seeing each other back then?” I’ve always wanted to know but some things you just don’t ask. And she was right. It was none of my business. No matter how badly I wanted to know.
She bows her head and sighs. I push her hair behind her ear so I can see her face. “You know that night I kissed you at the frat party?” she asks.
“Yeah,” I answer slowly, wondering what that has to do with it.
“That night before, Bones had come over to the house. My parents were out of town, and we had sex.” I knew he was going over there because we had plans, and he was late due to seeing her before. “After we were done, he was getting dressed, and he said that we needed to stop seeing each other.” She frowns. “I was confused at first because it was just sex, but then he said that he loved me, but he couldn’t love me the way that you did.” Her soft blue eyes meet mine.
I tense at her words.
“I loved Bones, the most he would allow someone to love him.” She sighs, averting her eyes again. “We started hooking up my sophomore year in high school when he was a senior. It was a couple of months before his mom passed, and honestly, I thought it was going to go somewhere. But after she died, he became more closed off than he was before. He was unreachable. It was like he felt nothing. Not even physical pain. I saw Grave spiral after that, worse than he already was, and I was afraid Bones was going to do the same. I clung to him, became his lifeboat because I didn’t want him to drown.” She takes in a deep breath. “Then he got injured in baseball while in college, destroying his chance at getting out of this town and going pro like I knew he wanted to do. There was never a good time to walk away. But you …” She looks up at me. “You didn’t have that problem. I remember saying how could Titan love me? He doesn’t even know me. I was attracted to you, yes. And I wanted you, yes, but that would be as far as it would have gone.”