“Because I want to try.”
I shrug my shoulders, sitting up on the countertop.
“You’re afraid I’ll have it like her. Aren’t you? You’re afraid to see me, to be around me if I do.”
Mom shakes her head.
My mother’s mother was Bipolar, and it was very hard for her. At the time she was told sometimes it skips a generation, but she forgot the part where that chance is particularly low for me. She’s waiting for the day she comes home and sees me manic or depressive. She dealt with Bipolar Affective Disorder in her mother every day until she took her life, and now she doesn’t want to deal with it in me as well. She told me when she drinks that she can’t handle the thought of going through it again. The problem with her mother was that she was un-medicated, and ended up making my mom’s life a real torturous existence.
Her hand brushes away some of my blonde hair, pushing it behind my ear. “It will skip you, I know it.”
Shrugging her hand away, I reach for the food, grabbing what I want. “And what happens if it doesn’t? Will I be homeless then?”
“No.” She shakes her head to confirm it as well.
Picking up my drink, I walk into my room, shutting the door behind me. A part of me hopes I get it, just to piss her off. Then another part of me is worried what happens if I do develop the illness. How much will I change? Will the highs be so high that I do something stupid? And will my lows put me so low I end up trying to kill myself the same way my grandmother did? That part scares me the most.
Chapter 7
Ryken
Livia’s at my door, I didn’t pick her up for dinner. I purposely forgot and didn’t bother answering any of her calls. No one comes to this door, so I thought I was safe. How wrong I was. Livia, I can see through the camera at the front door, is dressed in a short dress that looks extremely good on her. My father’s home, so before she can touch the doorbell, I pull the door open to a surprised face.
“I called.”
My phone’s in my pocket, but I’m not telling her that. “I’ve been busy.”
Her hand goes to her hip, her smile etched on her face as she answers me, “We had a date. Did you forget?” Staring at her, I don’t give her an answer. Then I feel him step up behind me. She shouldn’t have come.
“Who’s your guest, son?”
Livia looks over my shoulder to where my father is standing behind me. Stepping out of the way so she can see him, she answers for me.
“Livia, sir. Ryken and I have a date tonight, but he seems to have forgotten.”
“Ryken forgot?” I hear the tone of his voice. He knows one thing I never ever do is forget. My memory is as sharp as my father’s. Probably better.
“Maybe Ryken should invite you in. I just ordered.”
Livia looks at me with a smile wide on her face. I feel my father walk away leaving us both standing there. She steps closer, so her hand touches my hip.
“I’ll forgive you, just don’t do it again.” She pushes past me, so she’s inside the house. Taking a deep breath, I shut the door, then walk with her to the sitting area. My father’s already seated with Quinn at the table on his computer. Our maid walks out, setting all the food on the table, then walks away quietly. Livia isn’t shy and takes a seat without asking. Sitting next to her, Quinn shuts the laptop and leans back in his seat as he watches us.
“You were at the party the other night?” Livia says to Quinn.
My father’s eyes turn to him. “You were?”
Quinn nods his head, leaning in to pick up a bread roll, which he then starts to pick at it as we watch and wait. “I went to check on Ryken. See if he had any new material coming our way for business.”
“Oh… the clubs. I bet you’re excited to actually go into them in a few months?” Livia says, not knowing the real reason.
“Sure.”
Quinn looks at me, my father looks to Quinn.
“Did you see anyone interesting?” my father asks Quinn.
Quinn’s eyes fall to me.
Saskia. That’s who he’s thinking about.
“No.”
Now I owe him a debt, and he will collect. He’s just proved his point by lying to my father.
“Livia, was it?” my father asks. Reaching for the food, she answers him with a nod. “Tell me, does your school get many scholarship students?”
She nods her head eagerly. “My cousin’s a scholarship student. Her mother doesn’t care for her. All she has is my family.”
“Who’s your cousin?” Quinn asks. “Maybe I know her?”
Livia shakes her head. “Saskia. You wouldn’t know her. She doesn’t really have many friends.”