Sleeping is hard. Nightmares flank and grip me, then take me whole. I wake up internally screaming or covered in sweat.
My mother comes in to give me fresh water, and has left me something to eat. She never said anything, but I’m sure she knows I’m awake.
It’s now been two days, and I can honestly say the time hasn’t helped. The nightmares don’t stop, and when I’m awake, my heart won’t stop beating out of my chest. It’s all I feel—ba-bam, ba-bam, ba-bam—the sound reverberating inside me. It’s like a metronome, keeping me alive, but there’s severe pain with every single beat.
Turning over hurts so badly, that I’ve stayed in the same position on my back for most of the time. Wiping my forehead, I notice it’s cold from sweat. When I close my eyes, I see him and feel what that bastard did all over again.
Managing to gingerly sit up, I turn slowly to grab the water Mom placed there earlier when a scream rips from my body that I can’t hold inside.
“Everly…”
My mouth hangs open with the pain, and the beat of my heart is deafening. What I wouldn’t give for the pain to go away.
Then I notice someone sitting on my fluffy pink seat in the corner of the room, and I think the worst.
But then I realize it’s Gunner when he walks over to the edge of my bed. He sits on the side, being extra careful not to touch me as he locks his eyes with mine.
My heart rate slows down, its beats knowing he won’t hurt me, not like Roberto did. Well, I hope anyway.
“Gunner,” I manage to say, but that’s all I can give him right now.
He looks down at my hand, which is clinging to the blanket. I’m unable to let it go. Then his dark eyes find mine again, but they seem gentle, more so than I’ve ever seen them before.
His hand attempts to touch mine, but I pull back like it’s made of fire and it will burn me. I notice the hurt flashing in his eyes before it quickly disappears.
Finally, I gain the courage to speak. “What are you doing here?” I ask.
He hasn’t spoken since he said my name, and I want to know why he’s here.
“I’ve handled everything at your work for you.”
To be honest, I haven’t even thought about work, and I should have. It’s my café. My life. My biggest achievement. Regret instantly fills me that I could forget about it.
“I want you to come to mine. Not here. You don’t belong here.” He scrubs a hand through his hair.
“And I belong with you?” I ask, not understanding what he’s saying, but noticing there’s pain etched on his face.
“You do. You will always belong with me.”
His words make me angry.
I stand, the pain ripping through me, but the adrenaline keeping it muted for now, and tear the nightgown that’s covering my naked body off over my head and stand in front of him. His eyes only drift down once before they look straight back at me.
“Your family did this to me, and I know without a shadow of doubt you would have liked to do this as well. You don’t want me anymore, Gunner. Look how broken he’s made me. Look…” I fling my arms around, then stare at my skin, which is marred with purple and black bruises.
A knock sounds on the door and I pull the nightgown back over me to cover myself before I walk away to open it. When I do, my mother’s standing there with Alec by her side and Jacinta stands in the doorway. I don’t smile when I see him, but I do fall into his arms as he wraps both of them carefully around my body, gentle enough that he doesn’t hurt me, for which I’m grateful.
“Squirt… fuck! What happened?” I don’t answer him, simply lay my head on his chest. I feel him breathing as he strokes my hair. Then I feel him tense. “You…” he seethes. “Knew it had to have something to do with you, you goddamn bastard.” Alec’s hands grip me tighter, not letting me move.
“Remove your hands, now, Alec,” Gunner says in a calm but firm voice, but I know he’s anything but calm.
“You don’t tell me what to do anymore when it comes to Everly. You’ve lost that right.”
I pull back, Alec lets me go and I look up at him and he grimaces when he sees my lip.
“I’ll be down in a minute. I just need one moment.” I grip his hand, giving it a squeeze before I step back. He moves out and I shut the door, then turn to Gunner.
He looks at me with hope, but I have no hope to give him. Everything is gone, and I honestly have no idea what I have left. I feel so deflated. Miserable. Dejected. There are so many words to describe how I feel right now, and not one of them has anything to do with happiness.