“He’s cute, right?” May nudges me as she stands at Ryan’s side while he waits for, who I’m guessing is his brother, to come over.
The man behind the bar, his smile doesn’t disappear. I’ve forgotten how to smile like that lately. I’ve been going through life with just the motions, and not actually living any sort of normality.
“He is,” I reply, telling her the truth. He is cute. And he looks sweet with his large smile and handsome features. He has a light patch of freckles across his nose. When he turns to look at us, I manage to smile back, and this one isn’t forced at all.
“And I bet he isn’t an arrogant prick either.” May chuckles.
I don’t.
I don’t see Gunner like that. I saw him as someone whom I loved and who loved me, but in all the wrong ways.
She pulls me to the bar and I smile at the nice bartender, who seems a lot nicer than his brother. Again, I’m a shitty person tonight.
“Buck, this is Ev.” She shoulders me so I have to move closer. I offer him my hand and he shakes it while nodding to me with a smirk.
He leans over the bar, not letting my hand go. “I think they’re trying to set us up.”
I chuckle at his words and turn to look at his face, his eyes already burning a hole through me.
“I think so,” I reply.
He pulls back, letting my hand go. Turning back to his brother to chat, May pulls me until we reach a seat and sits me down like a toy.
“Time to get back on the horse. Damn, he could be a fine horse to ride.” She chuckles.
I look over her shoulder to see his eyes still on me as he speaks with his brother. Buck smiles, and when he does, he does so with his eyes.
“I’m not ready for anything like that,” I say, staring at him.
“It’s just a penis entering your cobweb-infested vagina,” she says, which makes me laugh.
9
Everly
“So, here it goes.” I hold my drink in the air as if it’s some sort of miracle I can actually still function.
I’ve been at the same table for what feels like hours, which, in reality, is probably no more than one or two, and I’m bombed. Drunk as a skunk. Completely blotto and feeling no pain. And in this state, it doesn’t stop me from telling Ryan, who I think is okay now I’ve had more alcohol, and May of course, my story.
“I’m going to be a divorcée. Can you believe it? Twenty-five years young and damn well divorced. Who would have thought that would have happened with the family I come from,” I say, then take another sip of this drink—which has become my new favorite thing in the whole wide world—I think it’s called a lemon drop, but who really knows.
“Yes, but now you know better. So, have all the fun and sleep with as many guys as you want, and don’t let a ball and chain of an ex-husband tie you down.”
“You’re right.” I nod my head, cheering her with my now-empty glass. “But first, I have to file these papers. Who would have thought he would do that? Is he moving on?” I ask her as if somehow she knows the obscure Gunner and can psychoanalyze the situation.
She gives me a blank look in answer because she’d be the last person to know anything about the most complicated man I know.
“It’s okay to not be over him, Ev. But you have to start somewhere, right?”
“I shouldn’t still love him,” I whisper, trying to keep my voice down, but in reality, I realize, I’ve shouted it because May raises an eyebrow.
“I know. It would be easy if you could turn it off somehow, but you can’t. You have to live through the pain, so you don’t fall into a trap like that again. My advice, pull him from your thoughts and get on a new cowboy.” She nods over my shoulder, and I notice this cowboy walking over, he’s wiping his hands on a towel before he places it in his pocket.
The music’s stopped. When did that happen? I notice that it’s just us here alone now. I don’t remember any of that happening.
How much time has passed? Shit! I’ve drunk way too much.
“Buck, you got plans later?” May asks, but she smiles at me.
“No, just tidying up here.” He nods, pulling the seat out that’s next to me. I feel his leg touch mine as he sits, and I instantly sober up at that one small touch. I look at him and notice the large smile he sends my way.
“Maybe Ev can help you. She loves to clean.”
What the fuck! Loves to clean? I cringe at her words.
“Oh, she doesn’t have to.”
I wave him off. “I have nothing else better to do, I suppose,” I say, smiling. I’m still buzzed but starting to straighten up as he passes me a glass of water and I sip it slowly while May stands.