“It’s nothing serious,” I say referring to Gunner.
“I hope so.” He says it with an edge to his voice I don’t question because if he wanted me to know he would tell me. “I won’t be at lunch this week… you’ll have to fend for yourself.”
“Why?”
“Business.” That’s all I get. I don’t ask any more because I don’t want to know, and he probably wouldn’t tell me anyway. But honestly, if I show any interest, they will take that as I am willing to step up. That’s not the truth, not yet anyway.
“So, I’ll get eaten alive without you there.”
“You can handle your papa, squirt.”
“As long as he doesn’t mention business. Sure.”
“He loves you.”
I shake my head. “Stop defending him. I know you think he walks on water, Alec, but he doesn’t.”
He leans in close. “I don’t think he does, squirt. You, on the other hand, I do.”
I smile. He knows exactly what to say to make me feel better. I lean in closer and hug him. Have you ever hugged someone who takes all your worries and cares away? Other than your mother. Well, Alec’s that person for me.
“So, when will I see you again?” I ask pulling back.
We both stand as the shop starts to close up for the day and he offers to walk me home.
“I’ll pop back.”
“Okay.”
“And, squirt?”
“Yes.”
“Be nice to your father. He does love you despite his old ways.”
9
Today’s close to two weeks since I met Gunner.
Weeks of, ‘What the fuck,’ and, ‘Did I just do that.’
As I close up the shop for the day, I think I’ve never met a man who confuses me so much in all my life. I believe in love at first sight, I do. I really, really do. But now, I think this is more about lust at first sight. Because that’s what this is, lust. I lust him more than I’ve ever lusted after anyone in my life. Gunner showing up at work today, I didn’t expect that. And I don’t expect the messages that follow either after I sent the first one.
Me: I shouldn’t have given you my key.
That’s true, I shouldn’t have. I don’t know what came over me to hand the key to my apartment over to him. He didn’t reply until I arrived home.
Gunner: You should have. Stop overthinking it, Everly.
I can hear him say my name in the tone he uses as I read the text.
Me: Seriously, I think I should take it back.
Me: This is me standing my ground, I think.
Gunner: The fact that you wrote ‘think’ in that sentence leads me to believe you don’t. Now stop before I come over there right now and spank your ass.
I stop because I need to breathe. Just for tonight, and especially after last night. He consumes me and I feel like I struggle to breathe when he isn’t near. I want him near all the time, and when he is my mind goes blank, so void of anything it’s as if it’s a blank canvas made just for him. I don’t like myself this way. Rereading the text, I crawl under the covers and tell myself not to dream of him tonight.
That won’t happen, because the minute my eyes close he’s all I see.
Hands slide around my waist, turning me over. Soft lips touch mine, waking me from my nightmare. Opening them as he pulls away, I watch as he yanks off his shirt followed by everything else before he lifts the covers and climbs in next to me, my t-shirt the only thing separating us. It’s all I wear to bed, and I didn’t expect company.
I don’t bother questioning why he’s here, I’m thankful he is. I don’t remember my dream, but I know it wasn’t pleasant. The back of my neck is wet from sweat and that only happens when I have a nightmare.
Lips as soft as cream kiss me all the way up to my bruised neck which he pays extra attention to. Hands rough as the bricks that hold this building erect, slide up and down my naked body under my shirt. I want to lie here and be worshipped. It’s been so long since I’ve been woken by a man’s hands on me.
That I miss it, now it’s here, makes me think, Maybe I won’t take my keys back if this is what I am in for.
“Did you miss me, bunny?”
I need to ask him why he calls me that. Instead, I answer him. “Yes,” I breathe through panting breaths.
He smirks before he hovers over me, now kissing my lips again, and I feel him between my legs.
“Hard and fast tonight. I’m tired, but still want you.”
I nod, not complaining. The desire to know he wants me even when he’s tired is empowering. It makes whatever this is we have, feel somewhat validated. That maybe I’m fucking him up in the same way he’s fucking me up.