He skimmed her back, his fingertips running down the length of her spine. “What does that mean?”
Earlier today this story had meant everything to her, and now she couldn’t think of a single reason why. Her ambition evaporated in the face of the very real danger. “It means I can’t stand the thought of you taking a bullet meant for me, and if I keep this up, I worry you might have to. It means you’re more important to me than any story.”
“Come again?”
He was going to make her say it. “I care about you more than I care about my elevated goal of saving America from whatever Zack Hayes has up his sleeve. I’m not an absolutist. People are more important. Love is more important. So would I sacrifice my principles for love? Yes. I will. I choose you, Connor.”
He lifted her up so she was eye-level with him. It was a conscious show of strength and every time he used it, she melted a little. She always felt so safe in his arms.
“You know just how to play me.” He frowned. “I don’t know that I like that.”
“I’m not playing you.”
“Then marry me. Drop this case because I don’t want you involved in it, either. Hand it over to Everly Parker. She has personal reasons to pursue it. We’ll get married and you’ll be safe.”
She nodded. The moment felt surreal. Had she really been shot at, made love to, then agreed to marry a man she hadn’t known a week ago? The whole evening felt disconnected from reality. But only the here and now existed. And her future—the one she would share with Connor.
Still, she couldn’t help but wonder . . . “My CI knew about you. He talked about you.”
Connor led her to the bed and laid her down, quickly following and pressing her into the pillowy comforter. Sure enough, his cock was hard and ready, already seeking between her legs. He dropped his head to her neck, pressing kisses in a line as he moved toward her breast. “What did he say?”
“Why would he call you Sparks?”
He licked her nipple and the world started to go hazy again. “It was my call sign in the Navy. I love your breasts. Have I told you how beautiful they are, princess? Your nipples knew they liked me before the rest of you. They always try to get my attention.”
She tried to hold on to her train of thought, but it was hard when he drew the sensitive tip of her breast into his mouth and began to suckle. “He told me to ask what you were doing in the Crawford Building a few weeks ago.”
Connor stopped what he was doing and sat up. “Is this some kind of interrogation?”
The room seemed colder than it had before. “I just thought it was weird that he seemed to know who you were.”
“Obviously he’s watching you. What does it matter now? I thought we just decided you were out of this. Or were you trying to throw me off so you could ask me your questions when you thought I was vulnerable?” He turned away, moving to the edge of the bed and shoving a hand through his hair with a frustrated sigh.
She curled onto her knees behind him, wrapping her arms around him. “No. I was just worried.”
“I was in New York visiting my mother. I don’t remember if I went to the Crawford Building. I went a lot of places a couple of weeks ago because I’m trying to sort things out with the nursing home. Just go to sleep, Lara. I’m not in the mood to become part of your story.” He stood and stalked to the bathroom. The door shut and she heard the shower start to run.
At least he hadn’t locked it.
She stared at that door between them. Was her CI trying to split her off from her protection? She would be easier to manipulate or harm if she was alone.
Or Connor was lying to her and he was somehow involved in all this.
It was an easy choice. She wanted to believe the man she’d agreed to marry over a stranger in a cheesy hat. She knew it made her twelve kinds of a fool, but she loved Connor.
Her cell trilled on the floor. It was still in the pocket of her pants. She grabbed it. Tom. He’d sent her a text with one word. Urgent.
Tom’s version of urgent often had to do with new movie trailers.
She turned off the phone and made her choice. She would step away from this story because it was too dangerous and she had more than herself to think about now. Connor had thrown himself in front of bullets for her. He won, hands down.
Tom had set up an elaborate proposal. Her parents and Kiki had been at the restaurant. Her ring had glittered at the bottom of a champagne glass. The event had been public and she’d been the center of attention, but Lara hadn’t been able to escape the nagging feeling that something wasn’t right. She’d accepted. Deep down, she’d known it was wrong. She’d said yes because all those eyes had been on her and she couldn’t let those smiling people down.
No one had been watching her when she’d decided to marry Connor. It had been just the two of them. It hadn’t been terribly romantic, but it did feel right.
She stepped into the bathroom and drew back the shower curtain. There wasn’t a ton of space in the little shower/tub combo. He was standing under the spray, his head down. His whole body seemed weary.
“I can’t handle any more questions now, Lara. Go to bed. We’ll talk in the morning. I’ll tell you anything you want to know. I’m tired. I don’t want to do this anymore.”
He didn’t want to feel hounded. She could understand that. A man wanted to know the woman he was going to marry trusted him. She stepped into the tub and eased a hand onto his back. “I think you were right. I don’t think we should talk. I just say stupid things.”
If anything, his head dropped further. “It’s not stupid to ask questions. You should. You should have been asking questions the whole time.”
“Only one matters. Do you still want to marry me?”
“Yes.” The word came out in a low growl.
“Then let’s get married and I’ll turn all this over to Everly Parker. We’ll move on with our lives.”
He straightened up and turned, towering over her. He took her shoulders in his big hands and dropped his forehead to hers. “I love you. I’m not sure that’s worth much, but I’ve never said it to another woman in my life.”
His words filled her heart. His admission was everything. She hugged him, molding her body to his. “I love you. I’ll be proud to be your wife.”
“I won’t let you take it back.” He sounded stubborn, but he exhaled, his body relaxing against her. He took hold of her hips again and pressed her close, rubbing his erection against her belly. “You’re right. Now isn’t the time to talk. Tomorrow we will, but you should know I won’t give you up.”
He would likely push her to shut down the site, but they could argue about that in the morning. Tonight, she wanted to revel in the fact that he was alive and wanted to spend his life with her. Nothing else mattered.
“Lara, I want you again. I always fucking want you.” His hands were restless on her skin. “Let me have you. Don’t turn me away.”
She knew what he was asking. He hadn’t come pr
epared for a sexual marathon. He hadn’t used a condom before because they’d been lost in the moment. Now he was asking for permission, this time both going into it with their eyes wide open.
It was a risk, but he was with her.
“I always want you, too.” She went onto her toes and brushed her lips against his. “I can’t think of a better way to celebrate our engagement. Make love to me again. Say you forgive me for tonight. I promise I won’t ever do it again. I’ll trust you. We’ll make the decision together.”
“I forgive you. I hope you can forgive me.”
“For what?”